When I'm sitting in the nursing home looking back on my life, what will I think?

How things materialize and come together is a phenomenon that's beyond my understanding. It's been a few weeks since my trip to Nicaragua; and since, I have had an unsettling feeling, as if a thought, an idea, an emotion would redirect my mindset, like a speeding surfer cracking the lip of an unrelenting wave, only to find his stance even stronger and his board in an even faster groove. This anticipation grew. And grew. And grew. It, among other thoughts, became almost unbearable and kept me up until the wee hours of the morning a few nights. Nicaragua left me with a grab bag full of sights, experiences, interesting people interactions, thoughts, perspectives, and emotions; a bunch of shattered pieces that I helplessly held in my hands and could not begin to assemble. Until now.

A few pages into the tail end of my current read, Taming Tigers, by Jim Lawless, I glanced over an idea that Jim reiterated throughout his book, this time, actually comprehending it. "Travel to that nursing home (mentally and in the far future). What does that man or woman (you) there wish that the man or woman (you) who is reading this book at this particular moment was doing differently in the way they invested in time?" I paused and almost instantly, like a old engine firing to life after years of dormancy, my mind processed the idea, began to go off on various visual tangents, and quietly came to a conclusion. I want to create a sustaining legacy of inspiration and people helping people. While I don't have a complete concept of what this "thing" will be, this blog isn't about revealing a solution, it is about my journey (and hopefully a spark to help you on yours).

But, huh... All it took was the book that I had in my backpack (the entire time I was in Nicaragua); a few experiences; and some time to digest it all. (Yep, that's all...) I wrote earlier, "SYRV X did not inspire me in the way that I had expected and I'm still feeling a little distracted, as though something that will test my courage, is coming my way. But as the days go on, I'm finding that my memories are still there, waiting to be digested; there are lessons that are waiting to be uncovered; and that fortunately, inspiration does not have just one form. This past year has been quite an interesting journey for me. One thing I have realized is to be present in the moment, even with distractions, because some of the most beautiful things in life cannot always be reenacted." I guess it's really coming together; I've got my skin back.


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